[80s German poetry-synthpop ] Wieder Abend

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jappe
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Posts: 2437
Joined: 19 Jan 2015

05 Feb 2023

Hey all!

I started a new project, making 80s-inspired synth pop using old poems, and this is the first one.
(And you German speakers, sorry for any accidental language-crimes, I'm using my high-school German which is from the 80s too :-) )

This is a song with lyrics based on the poem "Abend" (1904)by Rainer Maria Rilke.


Produced with Reason Studios, Bitleys sound libraries heavily used, mastered through Emastered.com

The poem can be found here: www.deutschelyrik.de/abend-1453.html

ChatGPT was happy to help with translation to English:
The evening dons its robes so slow and still,
With edges fringed by ancient trees so tall;
You gaze, and lands from you begin to spill,
One heavenward and one, a downward fall.

You stand, a part of neither, full and whole,
Not quite as dark as the hushed house beside,
Not quite as firm in evoking soul,
Like stars that rise each night and glorify.

And life, so tangled and so hard to sort,
Is left to you, vast, ripening, and fraught,
It shifts from stone to star, from small to large,
In ways that make it both constricting, sought.
Re & Bitley patch list:
Patches from Bitleys sound libraries:
- Polysynthmagoria
- LA Jupiter 8
- PPG choir
- Crazy lead
- Synclawave II
- 1982 bass
- Aggro bass
- Dirty funk bass
- Analogvetu3
- Danke choir
- Linn drum 1
- 707 kit 1
- Glocken ist zu Speil
- Drop a voice
- Attack pad1
- Mallets with spacious delay
- Chenille BBD Chorus
--------

RE:
- Viking Synthesizer - Bright Unison
- Steerpike BBD Delay
- RP-verb
- Selig Gain
- Selig Leveler
- Selig de-esser
- Onyx 430 limiter
- Synapse GQ-7 EQ

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Quarmat
Competition Winner
Posts: 459
Joined: 11 Feb 2021
Location: Europe

05 Feb 2023

I enjoyed this track a lot. Beautiful idea to give a second life to these century old poems. And the production sounds awesome to me. I haven't heard anything out of place, or I do not have the skills to notice something for a constructive critique on the mix/mastering side.
Composition wise there are some truly killer riffs (my fav is the one appearing at 1:48 → excellent!), the verse is perfect, but to me seems like this track is missing a proper chorus! A short melody easy to remembe and that goes on repeat and then fade out at the end of the song. I think that with a chorus this track could easily being aired on germans speaking radios. It is really really good. Great work!

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Chizmata
Posts: 918
Joined: 21 Dec 2015
Contact:

06 Feb 2023

jappe wrote:
05 Feb 2023
Hey all!

I started a new project, making 80s-inspired synth pop using old poems, and this is the first one.
(And you German speakers, sorry for any accidental language-crimes, I'm using my high-school German which is from the 80s too :-) )

This is a song with lyrics based on the poem "Abend" (1904)by Rainer Maria Rilke.


Produced with Reason Studios, Bitleys sound libraries heavily used, mastered through Emastered.com

The poem can be found here: www.deutschelyrik.de/abend-1453.html

ChatGPT was happy to help with translation to English:
The evening dons its robes so slow and still,
With edges fringed by ancient trees so tall;
You gaze, and lands from you begin to spill,
One heavenward and one, a downward fall.

You stand, a part of neither, full and whole,
Not quite as dark as the hushed house beside,
Not quite as firm in evoking soul,
Like stars that rise each night and glorify.

And life, so tangled and so hard to sort,
Is left to you, vast, ripening, and fraught,
It shifts from stone to star, from small to large,
In ways that make it both constricting, sought.
Re & Bitley patch list:
Patches from Bitleys sound libraries:
- Polysynthmagoria
- LA Jupiter 8
- PPG choir
- Crazy lead
- Synclawave II
- 1982 bass
- Aggro bass
- Dirty funk bass
- Analogvetu3
- Danke choir
- Linn drum 1
- 707 kit 1
- Glocken ist zu Speil
- Drop a voice
- Attack pad1
- Mallets with spacious delay
- Chenille BBD Chorus
--------

RE:
- Viking Synthesizer - Bright Unison
- Steerpike BBD Delay
- RP-verb
- Selig Gain
- Selig Leveler
- Selig de-esser
- Onyx 430 limiter
- Synapse GQ-7 EQ
not gonna give a general musical review here, even though the concept is interesting. something is stopping me in the first place: even as a native speaker, i can barely understand a word. the vocals are massivley masked by the instrumentation on all relevant frequencies and stereo positions. maybe you could give them some space in the mix?

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jappe
Moderator
Posts: 2437
Joined: 19 Jan 2015

06 Feb 2023

Thank's for listening & feedback, Quarmat & Chizmata!
I'll keep your notes in mind.

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Last Alternative
Posts: 1343
Joined: 20 Jan 2015
Location: the lost desert

17 Feb 2023

Holy shiz the bass is smooth - deep and clear. Fuck I wished I can be that good at low end. So! 80s all the way to Blockbuster to rent a VHS of the music video I see in my head to this song. I imagine strolling thru downtown Berlin nightlife for the first time when life was good but there's pimps and ladies of the night too. People having fun going in and out of places as a DeLorean drives by. I'm just taking everything in and walked into a little club and there you are on stage. Kewl tune.
https://lastalternative.bandcamp.com
:reason: 12.7.4 | MacBook Pro (16”, 2021), OS Sonoma, M1 Max, 4TB SSD, 64GB RAM | quality instruments & gear

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jappe
Moderator
Posts: 2437
Joined: 19 Jan 2015

18 Feb 2023

Thank's for giving colorful feedback LA!

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mimidancer
Posts: 637
Joined: 30 Sep 2021

09 Apr 2023

Fun, dein deutsch ist ganz ok!

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jappe
Moderator
Posts: 2437
Joined: 19 Jan 2015

16 Apr 2023

mimidancer wrote:
09 Apr 2023
Fun, dein deutsch ist ganz ok!
vielen Dank!

User avatar
raymondh
Posts: 1776
Joined: 15 Jan 2015

25 Apr 2023

Very cool, and enjoy hearing your music again - it's been a while!

+1 on the great smooth bass!

User avatar
jappe
Moderator
Posts: 2437
Joined: 19 Jan 2015

27 Apr 2023

raymondh wrote:
25 Apr 2023
Very cool, and enjoy hearing your music again - it's been a while!

+1 on the great smooth bass!
Thank you:-)
Time flies and I've been out of the creative zone for making music for some time (work stress) , nice to get back in again.
Hoping to finalize my current WIP this weekend, following the poetry concept I will then let Denmark know how imperfect my Danish is when I picked lyrics from their 1802 poem by Adam Oehlenschläger; "Guldhornene".

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