(Indie) Once For Luck feat. Reason Pianos

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JNeffLind
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13 Nov 2017



ONCE FOR LUCK

She cuts the cancer of the past out with cleaver./ As her shivers shift away from frozen to fever./ She’s smoking cigarettes until her tongue begins to blister./ To turn her lips to wounds and punish all who kissed her.

Chorus: Once to kill and once for luck- she pulled the trigger twice./ Shot the moon down, put the heart on ice,/ then hung the hollow shell back in the sky./ Used the frozen heart to soothe her swollen mind’s eye.

Blind but for memories that shine and shimmer crystal clear/ Looming overhead much like a shoddy chandelier./ She’s destined for a fall, covertly craving a crush/ to spur a silence speaking volumes hidden in a hush.

Chorus:

Her love and lust are completely covered in conditions. Her hate the master key to soul and heart’s ignitions./ Much like a city river poisoned, polluted, permanent gray./ She’s toxic to the touch, but beautiful from far away.

Chorus:

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BPGeez
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13 Nov 2017

JNeffLind wrote:
13 Nov 2017


ONCE FOR LUCK

She cuts the cancer of the past out with cleaver./ As her shivers shift away from frozen to fever./ She’s smoking cigarettes until her tongue begins to blister./ To turn her lips to wounds and punish all who kissed her.

Chorus: Once to kill and once for luck- she pulled the trigger twice./ Shot the moon down, put the heart on ice,/ then hung the hollow shell back in the sky./ Used the frozen heart to soothe her swollen mind’s eye.

Blind but for memories that shine and shimmer crystal clear/ Looming overhead much like a shoddy chandelier./ She’s destined for a fall, covertly craving a crush/ to spur a silence speaking volumes hidden in a hush.

Chorus:

Her love and lust are completely covered in conditions. Her hate the master key to soul and heart’s ignitions./ Much like a city river poisoned, polluted, permanent gray./ She’s toxic to the touch, but beautiful from far away.

Chorus:
Lyrics are deep bro.. And I like the laid back vox! We might have do a collar one of these days ;)
Reason is my girlfriend. Sometimes she mistreats me, but I still love her.

Checkout my tunes made with Reason: https://soundcloud.com/geez-musicals

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jappe
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13 Nov 2017

JNeffLind wrote:
13 Nov 2017


ONCE FOR LUCK

She cuts the cancer of the past out with cleaver./ As her shivers shift away from frozen to fever./ She’s smoking cigarettes until her tongue begins to blister./ To turn her lips to wounds and punish all who kissed her.

Chorus: Once to kill and once for luck- she pulled the trigger twice./ Shot the moon down, put the heart on ice,/ then hung the hollow shell back in the sky./ Used the frozen heart to soothe her swollen mind’s eye.

Blind but for memories that shine and shimmer crystal clear/ Looming overhead much like a shoddy chandelier./ She’s destined for a fall, covertly craving a crush/ to spur a silence speaking volumes hidden in a hush.

Chorus:

Her love and lust are completely covered in conditions. Her hate the master key to soul and heart’s ignitions./ Much like a city river poisoned, polluted, permanent gray./ She’s toxic to the touch, but beautiful from far away.

Chorus:
Beautiful song with beautiful words.
Are you still writing sonnets btw?
As a beginner it was very inspiring for me to write a sonnet with you in the Poetry thread - I haven't practiced since then though!

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JNeffLind
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14 Nov 2017

BPGeez wrote:
13 Nov 2017

Lyrics are deep bro.. And I like the laid back vox! We might have do a collar one of these days ;)
Thanks for the kind words man. Definitely be down to collab at some point. I'm getting my voice back in shape and am going to be recording a bunch of acoustic piano and vocal demos to hopefully market professionally. I think some of them could definitely lend themselves to getting chopped up or sampled or remixed in a more production intensive style.

I'd love to see what we could come up with.

Peace brother.

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JNeffLind
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14 Nov 2017

jappe wrote:
13 Nov 2017

Beautiful song with beautiful words.
Are you still writing sonnets btw?
As a beginner it was very inspiring for me to write a sonnet with you in the Poetry thread - I haven't practiced since then though!
Thanks so much man. I'm still writing sonnets though not as often. May have to start doing some bartending to make ends meet. I've actually been slacking on my writing recently but need to get myself back in the groove. Starting to make some recordings is part of getting into that groove. Getting my voice back into shape and then I'm going to be making/marketing demos. Need to get my shit together!!!

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CaliforniaBurrito
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14 Nov 2017

Hi! Great vibe and I really like the depth of this track. I must say I feel like the drums aren't fitting into the feel and mix of the track. Lots of highs and attack to the drum timbres - also pretty dry, as if they are trying to steal the show from the other elements.

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aburazaru
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14 Nov 2017

This is top notch! Mixed really well and the vocals are fantastic! I actually liked the drum kit used here; has a very abbey road/acoustic sound. I do agree that the highs could use a little bit pulled back to fit the darker feel of the song and some of the fills were a wee bit too mechanical for me. I'm guilty of the same thing too, so I don't have much room to talk, lol.

On doing this professionally, I'd probably pick up a vocal pack if you released one. I need some gnarly shit in d min though, so... think of me when you're recording one shots, k?
How was I supposed to know "don't touch" meant to not push the big...red...button?

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JNeffLind
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15 Nov 2017

CaliforniaBurrito wrote:
14 Nov 2017
Hi! Great vibe and I really like the depth of this track. I must say I feel like the drums aren't fitting into the feel and mix of the track. Lots of highs and attack to the drum timbres - also pretty dry, as if they are trying to steal the show from the other elements.
Thanks for the feedback man. I'm not much of a mixmaster so it's hard for me to hear exactly what you're talking about but I get what you mean about the drums trying to steal the show. I tend to mix my drums on the loud side because it seems like that's the trend in popular music where the drums and the vocals tend to dominate. At least that's how it seems to me. For my next song I'm planning on just posting piano and vocals and seeing how that is received.

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JNeffLind
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15 Nov 2017

aburazaru wrote:
14 Nov 2017
This is top notch! Mixed really well and the vocals are fantastic! I actually liked the drum kit used here; has a very abbey road/acoustic sound. I do agree that the highs could use a little bit pulled back to fit the darker feel of the song and some of the fills were a wee bit too mechanical for me. I'm guilty of the same thing too, so I don't have much room to talk, lol.

On doing this professionally, I'd probably pick up a vocal pack if you released one. I need some gnarly shit in d min though, so... think of me when you're recording one shots, k?
Thanks for the feedback man. I've never thought about making any sort of vocal pack. Wouldn't even know what's involved. Something to think about though if there might be a market for it. What I have thought about is posting some stuff for free and inviting others to use it as they see fit. Kind of like Alihoopa but without giving up all the rights. Props really dropped the ball on that one with the legal stuff. Otherwise I'd be all over it. As for the mix, you're probably right. I don't have the best ears for mixing and I definitely made all my drum fills by cutting up loops and the like. Very amateurish in that way. I'm a writer, not a producer!

Actually, now that I think about it, I was considering doing a Stranger Things inspired song, considering how popular it is at the moment. Maybe you'd be interested in giving it a remix. Something in a minor key for sure. We'll see.

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aburazaru
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19 Nov 2017

Do it! Then send me some files.... let's party! Or, just sing some stuff in a key... over a click track... and send me that too. I've been searching for a "writer not a producer" vocalist to experiment with. I want to see what kind of chops I have to be the "band in a box" type. Let's make some magic!

*Holiday season is super slammed for me at work, so be patient with turn around, lol
How was I supposed to know "don't touch" meant to not push the big...red...button?

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JNeffLind
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22 Nov 2017

aburazaru wrote:
19 Nov 2017
Do it! Then send me some files.... let's party! Or, just sing some stuff in a key... over a click track... and send me that too. I've been searching for a "writer not a producer" vocalist to experiment with. I want to see what kind of chops I have to be the "band in a box" type. Let's make some magic!

*Holiday season is super slammed for me at work, so be patient with turn around, lol
Hey man. Love the enthusiasm. I get a bit busy around the holidays as well, hence the slow response on this message. About to drive three hours for a Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow and then three hours home. I will definitely be sending you some stuff though. Just need to make the time. I've got the piano part, lyrics and melody all worked out. Just need to find a time when I happen to be in decent voice and have a modicum of quiet in my apartment to record some takes on the vocal. I look forward to seeing what we come up with. The piano part turned out well, nice dark brooding verse, with a bit of uplift in the chorus. I think it's a good seed. Let's water that batch. Hyah!

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aburazaru
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22 Nov 2017

Haha, let's party, man!
How was I supposed to know "don't touch" meant to not push the big...red...button?

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logicalpocket
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Joined: 27 Jan 2015

22 Nov 2017

Piano work is excellent here. Are you recording a live piano or using Radical (or something similar)? Either way it sounds really good.
Blep

ashu
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22 Nov 2017

Very nice composition, good lyrics !

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JNeffLind
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22 Nov 2017

logicalpocket wrote:
22 Nov 2017
Piano work is excellent here. Are you recording a live piano or using Radical (or something similar)? Either way it sounds really good.
Thanks man. It's Reason Pianos. The sympathetic resonance when using the sustain pedal really sounds great to me, and when you use parallel compression to bring out some of the more subtle tones, it really sings. It's the best piano in Reason in my opinion. Thanks for listening.

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JNeffLind
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22 Nov 2017

ashu wrote:
22 Nov 2017
Very nice composition, good lyrics !
Thanks man. I appreciate it.

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stratatonic
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27 Nov 2017

JNeffLind wrote:
13 Nov 2017
Deep. Mellow. Very nicely done. I thought that maybe the drums were a little busy for the arrangement. I like your vox - though could use maybe a little bit less processing. Piano sounds great.

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