my life

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Last Alternative
Posts: 1000
Joined: 20 Jan 2015
Location: the lost desert

Post 01 May 2019

A lot of you guys probably remember me (Jace/Last Alternative).. it's been a while.

Well, I was working on my album for like 3 years. Fear, time issues, and being a self-loathing perfectionist caused major delay. Benedict was gonna produce it until I pissed him off with all that jazz. He gave up on me and I don't blame him, but I paid him well for his time and hopefully it's water under the bridge, on a personal level. Well, I was on a roll late last year until I lost my job in October. 2 weeks later my mom and I found my dad dead in the living room (bad health and we saw it coming but never saw it coming so soon..)... then someone wrecked my nice car (which I got paid big time for but still)... I had just paid it off and it sucks to have a cracked bumper in the nicest car I ever owned. With everything going on, I kept the money.

I was in a bottomless pit of depression for months; I'm talking didn't shave, slept all day, avoided everyone, drank like a fish, etc.... it was bad and not 1 day goes by I don't think about him and I still get choked up sometimes 6 months later... . he was my whole life - all the way back to my earliest memories, and we were close.

On the bright side, I finally put an end to a 10-year relationship that wasn’t working and God I miss her but once I came out of my hole, and got sick of the dating apps and meaningless sex, I decided to go back to school to be a Radiation Therapist to try to save lives and make good money while I'm at it... I also met an amazing girl - she's Filipino, petite, beautiful, a teacher, smart, funny.. she rocks my world and almost 3 months since we met, we're deep in love.

Also, I recently moved into a studio apartment by downtown and close to the university and just started a REALLY good job at an asphalt company so things are getting a lot better. I knocked out all my math classes last semester and in a few weeks will start taking night classes - Health and Bio for Summer term (doing prerequisites right now).

Life is what you make it. It took a long time to realize it's okay to be sad but if you're not careful, it can really hold you back in life. So I blossomed and instead of living in survival mode and misery I (and my family) treated this terrible experience as a fresh start..... a new adventure... sadly without my dad, but my goal is to make him prouder than he's ever been and I know he's out there somewhere watching and I'll see him again when it's my turn to leave this dimension.

I used to be on here literally all the time, like every day like... too much like.... it was a problem, yo lol.. and I can't say I will be again but I will be more a part of this community again, that's for sure. Some of you guys have really touched me over time with your critique and support and for the fact that especially, our only communication is by typing and sharing our art and being fellow lovers/users of the same music software, I have to say that is extremely personal and meaningful to me. Since I'm living in a crappy (but cheap and cozy) apartment now, it's gonna be tough recording vocals and shiz so the album is yet again on hold until I arrange recording at my drummer's house. But for now I plan to finish up what I have and release what you guys have never heard at least........ ..... . so keep your eyes peeled.
Does this make me a certified blogger now?

HAHA stay Gucci y'all!

-Jace
https://lastalternative.bandcamp.com
:reason: 10.3 | iMac (27" Retina 5K, late 2015): OS Mojave, i7 Skylake @ 4GHz, 1TB SSD, 32 GB RAM, Radeon M395X | lots of sick gear

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Soft Enerji
Posts: 400
Joined: 16 Jan 2015
Location: East Lismore, NSW Australia

Post 02 May 2019

You've obviously had some tough times to get through but you made it. Welcome back on board!

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motuscott
Posts: 1528
Joined: 16 Jan 2015
Location: the new york

Post 02 May 2019

Welcome back.
Sometimes a cigar is just a synth that's on fire

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Loque
Posts: 5644
Joined: 28 Dec 2015

Post 02 May 2019

Sometimes i thought in my life "wtf and what kind of sh1t is going on here?" And than later "wtf and how great is my life?" And than it started again. Than someday i realized, it goes up and down, more or less, good and bad - here is no happiness without sadness. You cannot have only one side of the medal, without the other - it would be just a flat line. So i realized, life is a like sin curve. You have a lil bit on influence, karam and stuff, you get what give and things like this - but you cannot save the world. Its just a sin-wave...
272984,xcitefun-1.jpg
I thought i was the only one that realized it...man...i was so wrong...
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:reason: 10, Win10 64Bit.

MrFigg
Posts: 2427
Joined: 20 Apr 2018

Post 02 May 2019

I find comfort and strength these days knowing, through many tough experiences in life, that no matter how low and deep you go it always eventually gets better.

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MrBlue
Posts: 36
Joined: 12 Oct 2015
Location: France - Burgundy

Post 02 May 2019

Welcome back Jace...

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O1B
Posts: 1547
Joined: 26 Jan 2015

Post 02 May 2019

Image
Last Alternative wrote:
01 May 2019
A lot of you guys probably remember me (Jace/Last Alternative).. it's been a while.
...
On the bright side, I finally put an end to a 10-year relationship that wasn’t working and God I miss her but once I came out of my hole, and got sick of the dating apps and meaningless sex, I decided to go back to school to be a Radiation Therapist to try to save lives and make good money while I'm at it... I also met an amazing girl - she's Filipino, petite, beautiful, a teacher, smart, funny.. she rocks my world and almost 3 months since we met, we're deep in love.

Also, I recently moved into a studio apartment by downtown and close to the university and just started a REALLY good job at an asphalt company so things are getting a lot better. I knocked out all my math classes last semester and in a few weeks will start taking night classes - Health and Bio for Summer term (doing prerequisites right now).
...
Condolences to you on your Father. I really understand. I fear the moment, but I'm glad for/proud of the life he led.
Walk Good, Last Alternative.

Propellerheads ain't going anywhere.
O1B
I was in a bottomless pit of depression for months; I'm talking didn't shave, slept all day, avoided everyone, drank like a fish, etc.... it was bad and not 1 day goes by I don't think about him and I still get choked up sometimes 6 months later... . he was my whole life - all the way back to my earliest memories, and we were close.
Last edited by O1B on 02 May 2019, edited 1 time in total.

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 02 May 2019

Its like a reallt good movie the happy ending means nothing without a bit of heartbreak well done bro , im having one of them points in my life where i need to fix up a bit

mashers
Posts: 389
Joined: 05 Nov 2018

Post 06 May 2019

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