giving up alcohol

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sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 11 May 2019

reasonsuser88 wrote:
10 May 2019
sleep1979 wrote:
10 May 2019
got any ideas for dates apart from a bar ?
I've been wanting to take my girlfriend to the art museum here. Well, we actually have a lot of museums here in a central location and I might see if I can buy a pass through the whole park.
Sounds cool dude bet she will love that If its a hot day I might suggest taking my new dog to the park for a picnic .

MrFigg
Posts: 2427
Joined: 20 Apr 2018

Post 11 May 2019

sleep1979 wrote:
11 May 2019
reasonsuser88 wrote:
10 May 2019


I've been wanting to take my girlfriend to the art museum here. Well, we actually have a lot of museums here in a central location and I might see if I can buy a pass through the whole park.
Sounds cool dude bet she will love that If its a hot day I might suggest taking my new dog to the park for a picnic .
Aaaghh. Please don’t eat your dog man. Things aren’t that bad yet.

mashers
Posts: 389
Joined: 05 Nov 2018

Post 11 May 2019

So much pain in this thread :( I get that stories of moderation and alternatives will be hard for addicts. I understand that more than you realise, and more than I care to say. It's galling to hear other people doing things a different way, achieving happy moderate usage, when you're struggling with an addiction. But these comments are made not to shame or set an expectation or to say "I did it, why can't you?" It's to show that there is hope, the possibility for change. People can beat addiction. It is possible. And hearing others' stories can be part of that process, but you have to be ready to hear them. If you aren't ready to hear those stories, that's fine of course. But I don't think it's helpful to come into a discussion about addiction and rubbish people for sharing positive messages. What other purpose would a discussion like this serve? To share stories of addiction with no contrasting stories of hope and recovery? To share all of the negative aspects of drug and alcohol use, with no accounts of the possibilities of moderate and enjoyable usage? I don't think that is very helpful personally. If that's what you want to do, then go for it. But that clearly wasn't the intention of this thread:
sleep1979 wrote:
20 Apr 2019
Is it possible ?

...

once i pop i cant stop , which ones of you lot dont drink , and was it always that way for u ??
The OP is asking people to share their stories, successful or otherwise. So let them. If you don't like reading positive messages about recovery from addiction, then you don't have to read them. But that doesn't mean other people shouldn't either.

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 11 May 2019

MrFigg wrote:
11 May 2019
sleep1979 wrote:
11 May 2019


Sounds cool dude bet she will love that If its a hot day I might suggest taking my new dog to the park for a picnic .
Aaaghh. Please don’t eat your dog man. Things aren’t that bad yet.
She is cute man might go nice with a bit of sauce 😂 hot dog 🌭😂

This is my dating website pic 😂

Its working like a treat so far dogs gotta love em
Ay mr figgs
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sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 11 May 2019

mashers wrote:
11 May 2019
So much pain in this thread :( I get that stories of moderation and alternatives will be hard for addicts. I understand that more than you realise, and more than I care to say. It's galling to hear other people doing things a different way, achieving happy moderate usage, when you're struggling with an addiction. But these comments are made not to shame or set an expectation or to say "I did it, why can't you?" It's to show that there is hope, the possibility for change. People can beat addiction. It is possible. And hearing others' stories can be part of that process, but you have to be ready to hear them. If you aren't ready to hear those stories, that's fine of course. But I don't think it's helpful to come into a discussion about addiction and rubbish people for sharing positive messages. What other purpose would a discussion like this serve? To share stories of addiction with no contrasting stories of hope and recovery? To share all of the negative aspects of drug and alcohol use, with no accounts of the possibilities of moderate and enjoyable usage? I don't think that is very helpful personally. If that's what you want to do, then go for it. But that clearly wasn't the intention of this thread:
sleep1979 wrote:
20 Apr 2019
Is it possible ?

...

once i pop i cant stop , which ones of you lot dont drink , and was it always that way for u ??
The OP is asking people to share their stories, successful or otherwise. So let them. If you don't like reading positive messages about recovery from addiction, then you don't have to read them. But that doesn't mean other people shouldn't either.
Thanks man i think you got it spot on there 🙂

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 11 May 2019

Im tired of people giving people hard times on sites , this is one of the better sites Kvr sucks with attitudes I’m glad I’m a reason user

MrFigg
Posts: 2427
Joined: 20 Apr 2018

Post 11 May 2019

sleep1979 wrote:
11 May 2019
MrFigg wrote:
11 May 2019


Aaaghh. Please don’t eat your dog man. Things aren’t that bad yet.
She is cute man might go nice with a bit of sauce 😂 hot dog 🌭😂

This is my dating website pic 😂

Its working like a treat so far dogs gotta love em
Ay mr figgs
Twins :)

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 11 May 2019

MrFigg wrote:
11 May 2019
sleep1979 wrote:
11 May 2019


She is cute man might go nice with a bit of sauce 😂 hot dog 🌭😂

This is my dating website pic 😂

Its working like a treat so far dogs gotta love em
Ay mr figgs
Twins :)
U saying i look ruff 😂

Shes a good dog man

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modecca
Posts: 728
Joined: 07 Jul 2016

Post 11 May 2019

mashers wrote:
11 May 2019
So much pain in this thread :( I get that stories of moderation and alternatives will be hard for addicts. I understand that more than you realise, and more than I care to say. It's galling to hear other people doing things a different way, achieving happy moderate usage, when you're struggling with an addiction. But these comments are made not to shame or set an expectation or to say "I did it, why can't you?" It's to show that there is hope, the possibility for change. People can beat addiction. It is possible. And hearing others' stories can be part of that process, but you have to be ready to hear them. If you aren't ready to hear those stories, that's fine of course. But I don't think it's helpful to come into a discussion about addiction and rubbish people for sharing positive messages. What other purpose would a discussion like this serve? To share stories of addiction with no contrasting stories of hope and recovery? To share all of the negative aspects of drug and alcohol use, with no accounts of the possibilities of moderate and enjoyable usage? I don't think that is very helpful personally. If that's what you want to do, then go for it. But that clearly wasn't the intention of this thread:
sleep1979 wrote:
20 Apr 2019
Is it possible ?

...

once i pop i cant stop , which ones of you lot dont drink , and was it always that way for u ??
The OP is asking people to share their stories, successful or otherwise. So let them. If you don't like reading positive messages about recovery from addiction, then you don't have to read them. But that doesn't mean other people shouldn't either.
I do understand the frustration that comes from those, who do not like when others are having success with moderation.
Restraint and self control are a million miles away for some. I know quite a few homeless individuals for example, that have only ever known one gear: more more more: try to convince some of them, there is another way and they will laugh at you like you are an oblivious fool and instantly assume you had an easy life. When it comes to subjects like this, you have to anticipate resistance. It's like telling an obese individual: just eat healthier and exercise and you can reverse many of your health problems: they know that already they just cant find the consistent motivation to act on it.

¡ɹǝɥʇoɥɔɐǝ ɟo doʇ uo pǝʞɔɐʇs llɐ 'sǝɹuǝƃ ʇuǝɹǝɟɟᴉp 9 uᴉ 'sƃuos ʇuǝɹǝɟɟᴉp 9 oʇ ƃuᴉuǝʇsᴉl ɟo soɐɥɔ ƃuᴉɯlɐɔ ǝɥʇ ǝʞᴉl ƃuᴉɥʇou sᴉ ǝɹǝɥ┴

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reasonsuser88
Posts: 235
Joined: 29 Apr 2019

Post 11 May 2019

modecca wrote:
11 May 2019
It's like telling an obese individual: just eat healthier and exercise and you can reverse many of your health problems: they know that already they just cant find the consistent motivation to act on it.
I just watched an episode of the Sopranos where a capo in New Jersey almost got killed because he made a fat joke about the wife of the New York under boss. The hit got called off after he found his wife sneaking candy bars. He saved himself too because he realized he was overreacting to the insult which would've got him killed.

Underrated and very powerful scene here.

I'm the hardest working man in the rabid hole.

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boingy
Posts: 424
Joined: 01 Feb 2019

Post 11 May 2019

Methinks that the solution to this sort of stuff is not to be found on Internet forums..

reggie1979
Posts: 635
Joined: 11 Apr 2019

Post 11 May 2019

You thinks right, but for the most part it's been a pretty good thread overall.

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modecca
Posts: 728
Joined: 07 Jul 2016

Post 11 May 2019

reasonsuser88 wrote:
11 May 2019

Ralphie certainly wasnt the only one, who felt the need to make fun of Jenny.



reasonsuser88 wrote:
09 May 2019
having less brain fog is like a high I haven't experienced much.
The breaks we take from the things we constantly gravitate towards, in time can give us far greater/beneficial highs than we ever found, in the dead end addictive pattern.

boingy wrote:
11 May 2019
Methinks that the solution to this sort of stuff is not to be found on Internet forums..
100 percent disagree:
Discussion about addiction leads to the most important topic in the world: Self control.
¡ɹǝɥʇoɥɔɐǝ ɟo doʇ uo pǝʞɔɐʇs llɐ 'sǝɹuǝƃ ʇuǝɹǝɟɟᴉp 9 uᴉ 'sƃuos ʇuǝɹǝɟɟᴉp 9 oʇ ƃuᴉuǝʇsᴉl ɟo soɐɥɔ ƃuᴉɯlɐɔ ǝɥʇ ǝʞᴉl ƃuᴉɥʇou sᴉ ǝɹǝɥ┴

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reasonsuser88
Posts: 235
Joined: 29 Apr 2019

Post 12 May 2019

boingy wrote:
11 May 2019
Methinks that the solution to this sort of stuff is not to be found on Internet forums..
modecca wrote:
11 May 2019
100 percent disagree:
Discussion about addiction leads to the most important topic in the world: Self control.
Insight reveals the solution and the Internet is flooded with insight into anything you can ever dream of.

For now.

Welcome to the rabbit hole.
I'm the hardest working man in the rabid hole.

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Zac
Posts: 1404
Joined: 19 May 2016

Post 12 May 2019

My apologies for my attitude on friday night. This is a good thread. My drinking is a constant source of self reprisal and my anger stems from my inability to control it. I've been through a stage of going to meetings and that resulted in me being sober for 6 weeks (the longest period without booze since i was in my late teens). I am aware. I just can't find the strength to care enough.

Good luck to everyone making the effort.
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mashers
Posts: 389
Joined: 05 Nov 2018

Post 12 May 2019

Zac wrote:
12 May 2019
My apologies for my attitude on friday night. This is a good thread. My drinking is a constant source of self reprisal and my anger stems from my inability to control it. I've been through a stage of going to meetings and that resulted in me being sober for 6 weeks (the longest period without booze since i was in my late teens). I am aware. I just can't find the strength to care enough.

Good luck to everyone making the effort.
Life is hard, and addiction makes it harder. That will come out from time to time. Don't feel bad about it. Give yourself a break, and make some time to love yourself. It's the only way.

reggie1979
Posts: 635
Joined: 11 Apr 2019

Post 13 May 2019

I'ma drink tonight! But then again it's just the same excuse. Maybe I'll call someone tomorrow............

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 14 May 2019

I have had two sunshine coffee dates in two days , first girl a really hot 42 year old says shes not used to park coffee shop dates and im different to her normal type but shall we go for a drink ( shes a party girl that one i kissed her at the park so fucj knows what would happen if she drinks ) i and i met some woman today at the park ( she was completely lying in her pics didnt fancy her at all and sounded like a man and didnt let me get a word in edge ways ) she doesnt drink and the hot one loves one , see this is what makes it hard , a good night out with the hot one probably get some snogs , go on another date with the ugly one and wish I wasnt there I give up on life 😂 #give up on lovelife lol

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 14 May 2019

When i say park i mean coffee shop at the park

MrFigg
Posts: 2427
Joined: 20 Apr 2018

Post 14 May 2019

sleep1979 wrote:
14 May 2019
I have had two sunshine coffee dates in two days , first girl a really hot 42 year old says shes not used to park coffee shop dates and im different to her normal type but shall we go for a drink ( shes a party girl that one i kissed her at the park so fucj knows what would happen if she drinks ) i and i met some woman today at the park ( she was completely lying in her pics didnt fancy her at all and sounded like a man and didnt let me get a word in edge ways ) she doesnt drink and the hot one loves one , see this is what makes it hard , a good night out with the hot one probably get some snogs , go on another date with the ugly one and wish I wasnt there I give up on life 😂 #give up on lovelife lol
Just tell the one you like how it is. You’re in the process of cutting down but you don’t have anything against other people drinking and it’d be cool to go out. See what she says. She might surprise you. Nice dinner. Couple of glasses of wine for her. Cool.

mashers
Posts: 389
Joined: 05 Nov 2018

Post 14 May 2019

MrFigg took the words right out of my mouth. If the one you are attracted to is respectful, then she will understand that you are trying to cut down and not pressurise you into doing something you're not comfortable with. If she doesn't respect your feelings on this, then it's never going to work as a relationship anyway and you should move on.

As I think I've said before in another thread, be relentlessly and uncompromisingly honest. All the time, with everyone. Only then will you find someone you actually want to spend more time with.

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 14 May 2019

mashers wrote:
14 May 2019
MrFigg took the words right out of my mouth. If the one you are attracted to is respectful, then she will understand that you are trying to cut down and not pressurise you into doing something you're not comfortable with. If she doesn't respect your feelings on this, then it's never going to work as a relationship anyway and you should move on.

As I think I've said before in another thread, be relentlessly and uncompromisingly honest. All the time, with everyone. Only then will you find someone you actually want to spend more time with.
Yeah your right i dont think im thinking with my head with this one , party girls dont make good girlfriends anyway unless your a party man , heard bout your op figg good luck mate .

sleep1979
Posts: 961
Joined: 20 Jul 2017

Post 14 May 2019

Aint going out with the party girl gonna go for a coffe with a quiet girl on sunday, gonna try harder, lol updating my love life in a music forum 😂 i need a life

MrFigg
Posts: 2427
Joined: 20 Apr 2018

Post 15 May 2019

sleep1979 wrote:
14 May 2019
heard bout your op figg good luck mate .
Thanks :)

mashers
Posts: 389
Joined: 05 Nov 2018

Post 15 May 2019

sleep1979 wrote:
14 May 2019
Aint going out with the party girl gonna go for a coffe with a quiet girl on sunday, gonna try harder, lol updating my love life in a music forum 😂 i need a life
Good man. Honestly, no decisions should be made on the basis of emotion. Feel the emotions, sure, but make the decision on a rational basis. Rationalise everything, and if it doesn't make sense, don't do it.

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